I am confused. Is it so, that I really don't remember all the suck outs I have done? I sure remember all the bad beats, as they come in truck loads. Is brain so selective? As I don't use any trackers, I don't have a quick way to check it.

I have gone thru my hand histories though. Suck outs has been magically removed there too, but the bad beats are there. They never seem to vanish.

Am I in some weird paraller reality? Where is the door for the reality, where bad beats and suckouts change places? It seems that I go one step forward and two back.

Not going deeper to the hands I just played, I show you some very quickly.

PLO

AAKQ vs AQ73 (He was raising and raising. Gotta play with this kind of hand.  Pre flop all in???!!! I was totally surprised when he turned his cards, but not surprised then I saw the flop. Typical.) Flop-> QJ742

AAQJ vs 9h8h65   Flop AKh2h, T/R x/Th (I hit set of A's on flop which ends up to a straight. He was playing with very small flush draw and he paid my bets??? What can you do against these morons??)

QQJJ vs TT98   Flop --> Q88, A, 8  (Flopped Full House. His set end up Quads)

5543 vs AQ22  Flop--> 522, 6,4  (Flopped another Fullhouse. He flops Quads)

HOLD EM

KK was mini flushed on river

AA was flushed on turn

AK, flop AKx was flushed on river

2 x sets were beat

If I got some confident back couple days ago, it is sure gone again. Absolutely nothing seems to work. Cards feels as warm as my ex wife. (new thought, new thought!!) When is the session coming, where I actually win, and can have good time playing. The session that I enjoy poker again.

I've been thinking to take a break, but it won't help. If I played like an ass, it could help. But all the beating has come so, that there hasn't been a way to avoid them. Execpt not playing at all, but if we take that route, I can delete all poker software from my computers.

I just want to raise one question: Are the random generators on sites really random? There has been a lot of discussion about it, but no site never takes part of it nor has released their code. I think that it should be mandatory, that all poker sites coding should be published. If you don't have anything to hide, it should not be a problem.

What do I think? It doesn't matter, but I think that they are not totally random. Some sites seems to have more "action hands" than others, to gain more rake.

Please wake me up from this Twilight Zone...

-p-